My Blog is rated G

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Who knew that you could rate a blog? Mine was rated G even though apparently it has the word drugs listed one time. I will have to go back and read all my blogs to find out where that is. I sent Trey off to 4-H camp this morning and I didn't cry. At first I felt guilty not crying because I thought it was just because of his preteen talking back and smart mouth that I would not miss him but I realized later it is because I know that we do need a break from each other from time to time and how nice it will be to welcome him back on Friday.

I took Conner to the cardiologist and she is not sure what to tell us. She told us next time his heart races we need to get him to the hospital or a fire station and see if they can get a recording for her because we need to send the monitor back. Not sure what to think about that but I know Conner won't miss the monitor.

I thought conner and i would hang out in the pool all day but God had different plans. We got the much needed rain so we stayed in and just chilled. We did go out to eat lunch and i enjoyed being with him.I wasn't rushed to get anywhere and we just sat there and talked and I realized I was able to REALLY listen to him which I don't do very well very often because it seems we are always rushed to get somewhere. I like the person that I was to do much better. I seem to always be so much more relaxed when I have the day off. I do regret that I have to work for a living although i work for an amazing lady and a wonderful company. I often think if I didn't have to work i would be able to volunteer at vacation bible school and go to the different church functions and camps as a counselor and I think I would be so much happier and like the person i am so much better. Next time I will marry for money not love. JUST TEASING.
Timing is such a strong hold on me and I get so stressed out rushing from one thing to another even if it isn't really a rush I still feel like it is and get all bent out of shape. I don't really like that person but I am not sure how to change it. Maybe the photography will take off and i will be able to have the best of both worlds??

Braces

It feels like it has been forever since I last posted on this site. We have been so busy running from one thing to another it seems like. Between work, baseball and doctors appointments I am not sure if I am coming or going. We did go camping last weekend and had the most amazing time ever. It was the most I have felt relaxed in a long time. I haven't been to church since before Chicago due to our schedule and I have noticed I have alot of depression issues when I don't stay plugged into our church. I hope I get to go this weekend, it depends on when Conner plays travel ball. I wasn't real excited for him to play travel ball but him and Mike are having so much fun with Mike being a coach and Conner said he wanted to play as much as he can so I will support that.

I have the rest of the day off work today. Trey got his braces and his good friend Gant got braces today also so we picked up Gant after Trey got done and he is over here swimming and playing. I am going to sit on the couch and watch a movie and enjoy some me time.

Trey goes away to 4-H camp next week and Conner has his cardiologist appointment on Monday so please keep him in your prayers. We haven't been able to get a reading yet but have had one more episode where his heart was beating 145 beats per minute. Of course it was the one time I told him he didn't have to wear the monitor and we were away from home-go figure.

Trey has his 7 teeth pulled on July 5th-so keep that in mind also and pray that all goes well. He seems to be doing fine with his braces so far and it tickles me that him and Gant both got them the same day and seem so grown up now.....it is hard to believe.

That is it for now just wanted to do a quick update.

The Windy City

We made it back from Chicago about nine oclock last night. Boy am I tired. I got up and went to work and then came home and went back to bed and just got up a little while ago. Chicago was a beautiful city. I fell in love with all of the old buildings and the city life. I would encourage everyone to go visit there and want to plan a trip with my husband and kids to go back and see it on OUR schedule. We went through everything so fast that I have no idea what I actually saw. I was so busy counting boys heads to make sure that I didn't loose anyone that I really didn't have time to enjoy the museums and such. I did love the cruise down lake michigan, other than the pouring rain. We went to Millenium park and that was really pretty. I must say I am glad to be home and only watching after my two children. I was the only mom that got assigned other children to watch and I ended up having three boys that I was responsible for and that I had to room with. I learned more about farting, arm pit hair and other bodily functions then I ever had the desire to learn. There were thirty nine of us and most of them were girls. I never knew that eleven year old girls drank cappachino, we had to stop at every starbucks we saw. I was amazed by that. If Trey was remotely innocent before the trip I know he is not now. Those girls were very forward, wanting his phone number and taking all kinds of pictures. One girl even mooned another girl and they were showing the boys the picture until we put a stop to it. It left me wondering what I had really signed up for. I am not use to girls and their voice is so much higher then boys that it was really hard to be in a bus with lots of little drama queens for so long. The kids all got along really well and were just being girls and boys I just wasn't use to it. I could tell a big difference in the kids that had finished sixth grade and those that were getting ready to start sixth grade. That one year seems to make a big difference in maturity level. I don't know if I am ready for all of this. I failed to be a cool mom when I feel asleep on the bus ride home with my head over the arm rail going into the aisle. I woke up to find a boy taking a picture of me and all the kids snickering that I had fallen asleep and was snoring with my mouth open. (Sorry Trey, I really tried not to embarrass you). Almost all the kids were taller then me and that was a really weird feeling also. At one point, one of the dads grabbed me by the shoulders to move me off the curb and when he realized it was me he said I am so sorry, i just saw a little person standing there and didn't want you to get ran over. Gee Thanks. Rooming with three boys for four nights was quite an experience but it didn't compare to trying to get all the boys on and off the subway during rush hour Tuesday night when we went to the White Sox/Yankees game. Trey met alot of new friends and I noticed the little girls have text him several times today, Lord grant me patience. We had a wonderful time and I will post some pictures once I get the energy to load them up.

You Must Work at it............

Marriage is so hard. I was talking to a friend this weekend who is not married and he made the comment that he wasn't sure that he wanted to be. I told him it was worth it but mentioned that it was not easy and you had to work at it. I am having to remind myself of that today. I am constantly amazed at how different my husband and I. I love him very much and I know that he loves me but we are on different planets I think sometimes. My husband doesn't need affection and doesn't give it very freely. I on the other hand crave it and need it as a reminder that he loves me. I have come to realize sometimes the things that aren't needs to us we don't concentrate on. I really think that marriage isn't as much about what we need as it is about what the other person needs. Sometimes we have to do things that aren't as comfortable to us or that comes as naturally to us just because our spouse needs it. Men and women are wired so differently that I sometimes wonder why God made us that way. It seems like my girlfriends get me much better then my husband does. I really don't know what I want to say in this post other then that it is important that you learn each others love language and that you make a consious effort to incorporate their love language into your actions as well. We all show love and recieve love in different ways. My husband shows me he loves my by doing things around the house-installing new light fixtures and that type of thing BUT I don't see that as a sign of his love I see it as something that needs done. I show him I love him by kissing him and telling him but he sees that as being clingy and gooey. It is amazing how something that we all need so much of can be interperted in so many different ways.

All is quite and calm

I have the day off work tomorrow so I am staying up way later then I normally do. My husband and I are sitting on the couch while I type this and although we are not speaking i am really enjoying this together time with him just being alone in his prescence with no children right now is so refreshing. There is something about the quietness of night time that is really relaxing to me. My sister in law is undergoing Thyroid Cancer treatment and had to start her Radiation today and can't be around anyone for 48 hours and then she has to stay 6 ft apart from everyone for the next week. She is having a hard time so keep her in her prayers. i told her some people would change spots w/ her in a minute just to have life slow down for a moment and to get some peace and quiet. Isnt it sad how we can allow the little things in life to build up and drive us so crazy that we would trade places with someone with cancer just to have things slow down, just for the opportunity to not have anyone needing anything from you. To go to a place where noone has any expectations of you. We have got to learn to seek God and find peace in him. We have to take our issues to him before things get so out of hand. We have to remember that he is there for us and wants us to have peace but we must ask for it.

I get so stressed out at times and have to admit I have hoped i would get sick before, nothing serious just a cold just for the opportunity to be lazy and stay in bed. Why is it that we put so much pressure on ourselves that we won't relax until something forces us to relax. All of this went through my mind as i read my sister in laws blog and it has really made me think of how important it is to be good to yourself.

Who's in control here?

Today Trey had an orthodontist appointment he is going to get his braces on June 20th it is going to cost almost $5,000. and he has to have Seven teeth pulled in order to get the braces on and I have no idea how much that will cost. I was feeling overwhelmed tonight trying to figure out how to get to Conners Cardiologist appointments, Treys ortho appointments all the parent appointments for the different camps that Trey is going to this summer and concentrate on work when...all of a sudden I heard Conner screaming outside. I ran out there and Conner was laying on the ground with blood all over his face, he had tripped and hit the basket ball goal teeth first. He had the black basketball pole all over his teeth and the fall pushed two of his permanent teeth back and made them loose. We called the dentist who advised us to rush him to her office (for an emergency charge of course) She discovered it did push his teeth back and said that sometimes they will fix on thier own and sometimes they don't ( I thought of all the pictures that would be taken in the next few years) She mentioned he would be a candidate for braces and it would be fixed then-in a three or so years-until then deal with it I guess. While there she noticed an unusual bump in his mouth which was concerning to her so I have to take him back tomorrow which means more time off work. I often think how easy things would be if I didn't have to work and I truly believe that God didn't intend for women to work and be wifes and moms. I was starting to get really stressed out tonight worrying about the financial part of things as well as how much work will have to be missed to make all of this stuff fall into place-not to mention how sore Trey will be after having SEVEN teeth pulled. When all of a sudden I remembered that I am not in charge. GOD is in charge and he knows how all of this is going to work out and so I need to just relax and go along for the ride. I am blogging this so that when I get stressed out telling my boss I have to leave work early tomorrow I can just read this, breathe deep and remember that God is in charge and lean not on my own understanding....

God bless

Hand over the myrhh

Did you know that myrhh used to be used for stretch marks, athletes foot, bad breath, canker sores, chapped skin and to embalm bodies. Jesus was given Myrhh when he was born and he was taunted by myrhh upon the cross. We talked in class today how although bitter it carried healing qualities. Myrhh annoits the old us for burial that is what God wants to do he wants to bury the old and he wants that part dead. It can be be scary to part with the old but we have to trust God that he loves us enough to heal us no matter how scary it can be to put that trust in him. Natalie our wonderful SS school teacher mentioned how so many people run to alcohol, drugs, shopping or even run to food like myself when the going gets tough. Why is it so easy to run to these things and NOT run to our creator. I run to food but food has never promised to heal me, be there for me, make my dreams come true in fact it is the opposite food has promised to falsley satisfy me falsley make me feel better when it fact it harms me more times then not. God on the other hand already knows me better than anyone else, knows how many hairs on my head, knows how badly I want to run to food when the going gets tough. God has promised to deliver me from my additions and bad habits. God wants to see me fulfilled and happy all he is waiting for is for me to ask him. Why is it so hard to go to God? I think sometimes it is because you didn't have something as a child...maybe in my case a good relationship with my father, maybe it is because you think it is to good to be true? Natalie encouraged all of us to go to him today to ask him to bury the old us and annoint the new us. I am going to try to remember to go to God instead of the wordly things that I so often run to...

Just a thought..ps..check out www.landjphotography.blogspot.com we took pictures of Natalie and Phil Wilson this weekend and they turned out great.